Some days I don’t even think about it

Some days I am free from remembering… now, after so many years.  The whole day passes and visualizing the events, rehearing the words, feeling the terror, aching with the pain just isn’t there.

But not today.  Not since Aurora, Colorado.  The old kick to the gut was back, the sadness a fog.  I know how those families feel; I know how the shooter’s mom feels.  And they both hurt so much they can barely breathe.

victims of Aurora, Colorado

The victims were all great people, some heroes; one not even into her little life yet, just beginning it, six.  My heart hurts.

Is James Holmes a monster or is he mentally ill?  The age-old question in courts of law.  Either way, he will be out of the picture for the rest of his life.  As he should be.

4 thoughts on “Some days I don’t even think about it

  1. Brenda, I was just thinking about you yesterday. My friend, who is also a psych nurse, and I were discussing the shooter. We both think he was mentally ill, probably some form of schizophrenia. Of course, only time will tell. We feel for the parents. What heartache and tragedy for a family. Things like this are bound to open up old wounds for you. I feel for you. I hope this brings awareness for the need to provide more screening, services and care for the mentally ill.


    • All over Facebook people are calling for him to be strung up. And I can totally understand that feeling. At the same time, if they only knew, I’m sure he has been living in hell for awhile if he is truly sick, which I think he is. I wonder when we will ever get quality mental health care.


  2. I believe he is mentally ill.No one in their right mind could have planed and carried out something like this unless they are mentally ill.People on the news kept saying ” I don’t understand”.Of course they don’t understand.I heard that his mother said,”you have the right man”.His mother probably knew he was slipping into madness.What could she have done?It is heartbreaking,but the guy who shot John Lenon in his mind did it so Jodie Foster would pay attention to him.Who could understand that? No one.


    • The problem with mental illness, the sick people do not lose their intelligence; they lose their ability to distinguish real from not real. Just as an Alzheimer’s victim loses abilities to function properly, so do these mentally persons. It’s just so so sad for everyone involved.


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