The Agony of Defeat

Today… I admit defeat.  It’s painful.  I can’t get out of bed nor can I get awake.  The monster has kicked my a-double.  Saturday I could feel myself lose my footing, stumbled, took some major punches to the gut.  Sunday, the pummeling continued to the point I was numb, could only sit and stare.

Today… I admit defeat.  I am just too tired to go on, so went to bed and went to sleep as though drugged.  Which reminds me… I need to get my prescription filled again.  Sometimes, a therapist once told me, a person just needs a little help getting over the hump.  My hump is here right smack dab in the middle of my pathway.  There is no getting around it, and I sure can’t get over it.  I need just a little help.

Today… I admit defeat.  Every day I get up, look the monster in the face, and proclaim victory.  I may be bloodied and bruised by the end of the day, but I stand victorious, the winner.

Today…  I admit defeat.  The fight was too hard, or maybe I took the hit too intensely.  The life in me is barely there; the nothingness wanting to take over; the black hole pulling like gravity.

Tomorrow… I proclaim victory.  I know it will be tough.  I know the monster will be strong.  I also know I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.  Phillipians 4:13