There used to be a sitcom on television called The Jeffersons.
Their theme song went “movin’ on up, to the East side” because they were coming up in the world to a better financial position. I love to take little diddies and put a word or two of my own in there to make it mine. This is one of them.
My movin’ up has nothing to do with being well off monetarily and everything to do with being well off mentally. It’s been a struggle to move up now for about half my life: a long, long time. First was a bad marriage and divorce to overcome while coping with a child not yet diagnosed with schizophrenia, being bewildered at every turn with every psychiatrist from the one who specialized in children to the one that worked for the local health department, and all the others in between; the death of another child’s best friend and the subsequent battle with drug addiction; depression and anxiety problems; the death of my second husband and years of mourning what could have been, what could have been done differently. Pain… and more pain.
The only reason I mention those things at all is to tell you about my good, dear friends without whom I could not and cannot live. They are the reason I am movin’ on up. They are the rocks that anchor my distraught psyche, the rocks upon which God has set me, the pavilion wherein He has hidden me. I so totally love them all.
They have prayed my son alive because I am as certain as I sit here that he would have died without their shawl of prayer wrapped around him.
They have wrapped us in their arms as well with hugs that left us giddy with delight and comfort. (You know who you are, Howard.) They have come to me in the night, flashlight in hand, when I feared I had run over my little cat, Bo, to look for him, all three kids: Joseph, Tyler, Emily, and Mom Cheryl.
Dolores (a/k/a Grandma to Kate) gets out in the cold to fetch me a gallon of milk so I don’t have to get the grandgirls out; brings me blog-warming gifts (picture coming soon); and teaches me to be kind and loving and accepting of all people. Terah, who loves me with agape love that fills my soul with lightness, who makes a way to bring me back from the precipice of darkness, who finds my Eagle’s Nest that I might hide under the shadow of His wing (Psalm 17:8). Jeri Lyn, who takes my burdens into herself to ease my morbid obsessions, that I might not worry about the evil that could befall my little ones. Joy, who stood vigil at my husband’s side as he lay dying. Alberta, who always has my back, always worries about me, always seeing about me. These are only a few; God gave me many.
The study group who saw me through that first year of extreme sadness; the group God brought together just for me. Ah, how He loves me. This group who are now my sisters, these women whom I will forever have a bond. How I love them.
Brenda,
You are awesome! Thanks for sharing your heart. You will surely touch so many people who need a word!
Love you
LaDonna
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If the words of my heart touch someone half as much as you all have touched me, then I shall be a happy camper. 🙂 Thank you.
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You have been thru what most people will never see or wish to see…you have been thru the dark…and still come out a beautiful woman with a wonderful soul. In turn we are lucky to know you, to know that someone that has traveled your path that still possesses a heart bigger than herself. So know you are loved by your friends and that we consider ourselves lucky to count you as one also…..
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uh-huh. I feel a blog coming on, and I am soooo excited!! I LOVE Note*to*Self. I should have come up with a better name. Get it out there, girl! Thank you for your kind, kind words.
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My friend BB…I am just crying tears of joy for your “moving on up” . I know that you are doing just that….you can smile and laugh today because you have “moved up” . Yes you have many friends, but your faith has always been solid. I love you Brenda and I am just so happy you are able to write all
of the words so they sound as if you are saying them out loud. May God bless you always. Keep the blog coming my way.
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Woman, you are my No. 1 fan and supporter!!! Thanks for encouraging me.
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Your Father in heaven….your daddy….your poppa knows you so well!! You are no stranger to Him and He knows you by name, knows the color of your eyes and the tenderness of your heart. And oh….how He loves you so!
For us – your family, your friends…we are honored to be a part of your life. You are the one that brings smiles to faces, you help us laugh even through times that were so, so sad…. (grief shopping late at night getting caught by Terah when you promised us….You were going to STOP!)
God’s promise: “I’ll never let you down, never walk off and leave you” Hebrews 13:5 Message Bible
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Oh, lands, don’t we have memories?!! What a season God gave us. I love Heb. 13:5 although I think the Message Bible got it wrong on this one. The NIV says “never leave you nor forsake you.” Nothing about won’t let us down. 🙂 But He definitely will not leave nor forsake. And this I know for truth.
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Love this, Brenda. I could hear your voice through all of it. I don’t know you very well and had no idea about all you have suffered. I’m so glad for you that our God loves you so much and surrounds with his loving children. I’m so glad to know you.
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aw, Chellie, thank you. It’s our good fortune to be in such a great book club, isn’t it?
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Brenda, Brenda, Brenda,
You are such an inspiration to everyone. Praise the Lord for putting us together. You have put a smile on the face of God today and every day. You praised His name when many would have walked away! You will forever be the Jobette I love!!!
I love you, sister! And know you moved up a LLLLLong time ago!
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Leesie, Leesie, Leesie,
I love you too, girlfriend, my bearer of burdens, my prayer warrior, my partner in discombobulation. At least our chaotic households. 🙂
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My Sunday School class is probably so sick of hearing about my court reporter friend, Brenda, who has been through just about everything imaginable…you are my inspiration at times, B. As much heartache as you have been through, it has made you who you are. I’m sure your friends could say a lot of the same things about you being there for them. Keep on movin’ up…
P.S. Third Day has a song called “Movin on up” and it’s on their Chronology Vol. 2 CD, but it may be on youtube. The words are perfect…”I’m movin’ on up now, getting out of the darkness, yeah, My light shines on, My light shines on, My light shines one…” I think you would like it! Love ya.
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Third Day is my very favorite, and now that you remind me, I do remember that song and absolutely love it. That’s the one I should have used. It’s great. You make me feel special; maybe I should come and spend the night with you and go to your Sunday School class so I can meet everyone. (I will leave my cat safe at home.)
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Great Read. Rest assured, you will always have a very good friend right down here in Florida. I think about you all the time. Wish I could be in the area more to lend an occasional note of encouragement.
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Oh, Underwood, you sweetheart. I so miss you. If I get down that way ever again, I am going to look up you guys. You were and always will be one of my most favorite people. 🙂
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Brenda, God bless you! YOu are such an inspiration. You are truly a Job to
us that have not been tested as you have. I hope you do move on up and away to
live happily ever after! Love you!! Gail
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hahaha Too funny that you call me Job. I used to tell the study group God had me confused with Job; thus the Jobette from Lisa. But He is good… no matter what. (although He’s heard me say a lot of other not-so-nice things about and to Him as well over the years.)
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Oh Dear Brenda, what strong woman you are to endure such heartache. You are beautiful inside and out!
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You are a good woman, always can find something nice to say. I should learn from that and keep my mouth shut a lot more often, I fear. Thank you, Karen.
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